I’m so happy to raise these beautiful kids, but all my friends are busy enjoying their retirement.
Adopting older children was right for us, but when we get together with our friends, we are the only ones who have teenagers. How did we go from having no children to having the oldest children in our friend group?
As families grow and change, it can be challenging to build and navigate a new support system, which can feel isolating. However, there are steps you can take to ensure you have a support system that works for your whole family.
- Educate and provide resources (articles, books, etc.) to those closest to you before children come into your care. Be familiar with those resources so it’s easy to have open and honest conversations with friends and family. This will let you know how to talk with others about how they can best support you and your children.
- Seek out in-person and/or online support groups to connect with similar families.
- Expand your social circle. Work to connect and interact with families and parents at school events, extracurricular activities, and community activities. Schedule a play date and invite the child’s parent in for coffee while the kids play. This allows an opportunity to get to know the children and their families with whom your kids are directly interacting.
- Be clear about what you need from your support system, whether having a night out, asking for a meal to be made during your transition to this new role, or making sure people regularly check in on you. Many people want to be supportive but don’t always know how. Don’t be afraid to explicitly ask for what you need.
It truly takes a village to raise children. Build, expand, and lean into your support system. Let them know what you need, connect with others, learn, and educate those around you.
Recommended Resources:
From the Resource Library
- Healing & Hope E-Series
- Dancing with a Porcupine: Parenting wounded children without losing your self, by Jennie Owens
- Virtual Resource Kit: Self-Care
Tip Sheet
Training From Champion Classrooms
